How to use this app
Calm and Confident offers you 10 sessions of guided meditation and bilateral stimulation (BLS) designed to reduce physical and emotional stress AND build confidence. Confidence doesn’t always mean feeling calm, but it does rest on regularly being able generate such feelings despite the vicissitudes of life. The ability to feel calm is a foundation for confidence.
The first 7 sessions aim to stimulate calmness through various physical, emotional and mental inputs targeting stressful sensations and feelings. Namely, focused attention, music, BLS and soothing imagery (coupled with visual BLS on ‘peaceful journey’). Some sessions (eg; Calm) focus on external sensory and mental stimulation while others (eg; ‘stress release’) rely on focused attention and sensory tracking. You should listen to these sessions to reduce physical and mental stress while you are experiencing it, or as soon as possible afterwards. Because stress and a lack of confidence can also be part of on-going feelings of tension and a general sense of inadequacy which may not necessarily be related to a situation specific, you may also find it beneficial to listen whenever you are aware of experiencing negative feelings.
The last 3 sessions focus on building confidence. ‘Healing the anxiety’ (session #8) is a powerful emotional healing exercise which goes beyond stress management to developing emotional integration – the key to feeling confident. This session with help you repair disconnection between your emotional (child) and rational (adult) parts. Emotional integration is the key to self-knowing. Sessions 9 and 10 build on this with more suggestions for banishing stress and feeling more and more confident. These last two sessions incorporate primary true affirmations which, when received under conditions of calmness, will become a part of your new sense of self. They are the messages, validations and reassurances you should have received as a child but maybe didn’t.
You should notice feeling lighter and calmer immediately following experiencing any of the sessions. But also look out for changes in how you cope with challenging situations in the days following. Be open to the possibility that you can change. Noticing changes in your emotional reactions is key to integrating new learnings and developing a more confident view of self.
Each of the 10 sessions is designed to target whole brain activity (ie; sensing, feeling, thinking) associated with stressful feelings and sensations in positive ways. Two of the sessions (‘Calm 2’ and ' and ‘Calm and Confident 2’) are from a CD of the same name which I produced some years ago. Below are detailed descriptions of each session and how to use it.
Track listing and descriptions
1. Calm
For use when you are seeking long-term relief from feelings of stress. A soothing meditation combining comforting words, music and BLS to stimulate decreased tension and emotional distress and calmness. This session is designed to stimulate physical, emotional and mental processes to help you feel calm without having to try or think about it. The key is to stimulate your nervous system from different directions (auditory, emotional, mental) simultaneously, making it easier to ‘unlock’ whatever is maintaining your stress.
2. Calm 2
An alternative (CD) version of ‘Calm’ with slightly different wording and musical arrangement.
3. Peaceful journey 1
For use when you are seeking relief from present feelings of stress. A soothing meditation combining comforting words, music, imagery and natural BLS to help you feel calm. This session is designed to stimulate physical, emotional and mental processes with an added visual dimension, to help you feel calm without having to try or think about it. Can be viewed or just listened to.
4. Peaceful journey 2
For use when you are seeking relief from present feelings of stress. A soothing meditation combining comforting words, music, imagery and ambient BLS to help you feel calm. This session is designed to stimulate physical, emotional and mental processes via an added visual dimension, to help you feel calm without having to try or think about it. Can be viewed or just listened to.
5. Bilateral stimulation (natural)
Just BLS - a natural more ‘acoustic’ sound. For use when you are seeking relief from present feelings of stress. Useful for interrupting intrusive thoughts, stimulating relaxation, and getting to sleep. You may want to use this strategy as an alternative to the guided meditations once you are familiar with how BLS can change negative patterns of feeling and thinking. Begin by focusing on whatever distress or thoughts you are seeking relief from, and then commence BLS and let your attention rest on that. Just let whatever happens happen. Afterwards notice any changes in your body or your mind (eg; feeling lighter, mentally quieter). You can listen and view the visual BLS or just listen.
6 Bilateral stimulation (ambient)
Just BLS - a softer sound. For use when you are seeking relief from present feelings of stress. Useful for interrupting intrusive thoughts, stimulating relaxation, and getting to sleep. You may want to use this strategy as an alternative to the guided meditations once you are familiar with how BLS can change negative patterns of feeling and thinking. Begin by focusing on whatever distress or thoughts you are seeking relief from, and then commence BLS and let your attention rest on that. Just let whatever happens happen. Afterwards notice any changes in your body or your mind (eg; feeling lighter, mentally quieter). You can listen and view the visual BLS or just listen.
7 Stress release
For use when you are seeking relief from physical sensations of stress. A sensory-tracking exercise to help release physical tension associated with psychological stress (eg; a knot in the stomach, lump in throat, tightness in the chest, general tension). The verbal guidance provides a kind of safe place from which to explore your feelings and release any blocks to their healthy expression and fulfilment. Knowing how to be with your feelings leads to increased mind-body integration and decreased stress and tension. This exercise will help you release tension feel more embodied, less overwhelmed, more whole.
8 Healing anxiety
For reconnecting with your inner child to alleviate anxiety. This session will help you reconnect with any abandoned aspects of your-self, particularly childhood emotions, leading to increased emotional integration – the foundation stone of confidence. This session is particularly helpful if your anxiety or stress is based on childhood emotional abuse or neglect. This session will create the foundation stone for feeling confident.
9 Calm and confident 1
For building confidence. A soothing meditation combining comforting words, music and BLS to take you from calm to feeling confident. The affirmations in this session will nourish your self-esteem and stimulate increased expression of your needs and wants in ways that will surprise and touch you.
10 Calm and confident 2
An alternative (CD) version of Calm and Confident with slightly different wording and musical arrangement.
For best results you should listen to the tracks that incorporate BLS with headphones or hear-buds (ie; every session except #9 and #10). However, benefit can also be obtained through listening to the BLS sessions without headphones once your brain has become familiar with the effect. You can use the app anytime anywhere but a quiet environment when you do not feel too overwhelmed by stress or physical discomfort is best. Always approach the sessions with an open mind and never try to force anything to happen.
You do not have to listen to the 10 sessions sequentially – you can pick and choose as you like. There is also a facility to create your own playlist so you can listen to your favourite sessions consecutively.
While every effort has been made to provide a genuinely useful resource this app should of course not be considered a substitute for professional advice or treatment.